Book Extracts of "Iron John" by Robert Bly
Contributed by Robert Henderson
INTRODUCTION:
Iron John is a book about boys becoming MEN. It shows us how to get in touch with the masculinity that lies deep within all of us. But, like the story it is a long and hard journey requiring a conscious effort on the individual. The journey in Iron John shows us the stages that a boy must pass through in order to acquire his masculinity. These stages also get us in touch with the community in the psyche. Bly speaks of seven beings within the community: the king, the warrior, the garden (lover), the cook (magician), the trickster, and, the grief man. This community must work together if we are to be balanced; Bly says, " A whole community of beings is what is called a grown man".
THE ROAD:
The road according to Iron John is a road that prepares a child for manhood. In the first stage, we must learn to become self-dependent. We must all learn to live on our own and follow our own dreams. The boy in the story does just that; he chooses to accept Iron John as his mentor. The second step is discipline; Learning to control our compulsive urges. He teaches us to come in contact with who we are, "KNOW THY SELF". Next, we are introduced to the real world. We must go to work, most of us starting at the bottom and working our way to the top. During this time arrogance can cause trouble. We must be aware of our actions at all times. Fourth, we must seek out the garden with four walls, so that our emotions of the past can surface. These emotions need to be addressed and dealt with in order to move on. This is also the ideal time to seek out spirituality. After we have established our garden, we should work on the warrior within, and find our strength. When we have the garden established it is easier for the warrior to excel. With a cause to fight for, he has sincerity, determination, and a sense of honor. Next is the healing process, "we notice a wound which we knew not we had"(Bly), deep within the soul. Upon healing this wound we can find love for all that hurting from, our parents, our gods, those around us, even our selves. This healing can take most, if not, all our life. Last, we learn of bonding with our fellow man and woman. We learn to trust our inner voice with a sense of security. Those who know us come for advice and counselling. We are all destined to be teachers like Iron John, but we must fist start by trusting the positive male role models in our lives.
THE COMMUNITY OF BEINGS:
THE KING:
There is a physical king and a mythical king; both have positive and negative qualities. We need both. We need to seek out positive male role models in our daily lives. We must keep in mind that they are only human and at times fall short of our expectations. The physical king may also abuse his powers by becoming controlling or abusive. These are not true kings and are the reason we tend to think that there are no (real) kings in today's society. The mythical king is much more prevalent. He exists in the ancient mythology of many different cultures. One just has to read ancient mythology or folklore to come in contact with him.
THE KNIGHT:
The mentality of a knight is duty first, arrogance, and sense of superiority. This is a necessary step to manhood. But, with age comes wisdom. The knight must learn when to sheath his sword and when not to. We must all become knights.
THE GARDEN:
The garden or the lover is an emotional being. We must find the garden with four walls that lies deep within us. This is where we find love; love for our father who has abandoned us. Love for our mother who controlled us, and so forth. We must find balance in our life at this time. We must embrace our feelings. We must build a temple to our daemons and our gods.
IRON JOHN:
Iron John is a free spirited soul, a being of nature. He asks us to slow down and smell the wild flowers. He is our spiritual teacher for manhood. Iron John is a reflection of the old man in life who teaches us the values of being a man. It is our job to find this old man if he has not yet appeared in our lives. The physical teacher will awaken the spiritual teacher. Iron John does not find you; you must find him. Once you find him, then follow him. Iron John is the bridge between boy and man.
THE TRICKSTER:
The trickster is a man of change. He moves against the flow. It is even his job to reverse the flow of energy. We see the trickster in the jester who is a person of humor. He brings light to the darkness.
THE COOK:
The cook (magician) is the inner voice we must all follow. He is the one who bestows our lessons unto us when they are needed. The cook is the strength a child possesses when attacked. This strength will help get him though adolescence. He has the compassion of a father.
THE GRIEF MAN:
The last of the persons is the Grief Man. "There is a grief in men that has no cause", says Bly, it just exists. We must learn, as men, to grieve. Bly says, "When men get older, he gives himself permission to go down". We give ourselves permission to grieve. But most of all we give ourselves permission to go deep within each of our beings. A bottomless pit in our subconscious, which we have only begun, scratched.
INITIATION
One of the underlining importances in Iron John is initiation. I believe initiation is the door to manhood. Initiation is practiced in many cultures, which would swear by it. Only in the western civilization do the rites of passage go unpractised. Our culture and our boys have been robbed of an important stage in life, initiation into manhood. It is up to the older generation to replace it. Not for ourselves but for our children. Men need gatherings; spiritual retreats where they can come together as a whole. They need to communicate with one another about the male mysteries. But most importantly, they need to initiate their children into these mysteries. Our young men know there is something missing in them. They are desperately seeking it. Unfortunately they don't know where it is or what they are looking for. They need the ELDERS of the male tribe to step forward and take responsibility. We must bond together as a whole to teach our children, and in so doing we teach ourselves what was not available to us at that time, male bonding.
MYTH AND FOLKLORE
The folklore of Iron John is a guide into the human soul. Other stories would work just as well as Iron John. We should do or part to find the sacred in as much of the literature that we can. I believe that folklore and mythology is a tool to unlock the secrets of the universe. We must first be open to what we are reading and look at it for what it has to offer us in way of our lives. In conclusion Iron John is a wonderful book. A book if read with a certain understanding that it is gong to change the way we view ourselves and those around us, then it is a must read for every adult male.